Skills for Coping & Healing

When we’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed, our breathing can become quick and shallow which can actually increase stress. Coming back to your breath is a simple but powerful way to soothe your nervous system and ground yourself when experiencing painful emotions.

1. Deep Breathing

• Inhale through your nose slowly filling up your lungs and diaphragm, counting to four.
• Hold your breath as you count to seven.
• Exhale completely though your mouth with a gentle sigh, counting to eight.
• Repeat as many times as you need.

By purposefully slowing your breath and making your exhales longer than your inhales, you are focusing your attention on something that is within your control and that can directly impact the state of your nervous system. To learn more about soothing your nervous system, click here.

2. Square Breathing

• Inhale through your nose slowly filling up your lungs and diaphragm, counting to four.
• Hold your breath as you count to four again.
• Exhale completely though your mouth with a gentle sigh, counting to four.
• Inhale through your nose slowly filling up your lungs and diaphragm again, counting to four.
• As you breathe, imagine that you are tracing the lines of a square with each inhale and exhale. If you find it helpful, you can even trace the square on the palm of your hand with your finger while you breathe.

3. Breathing Balloon Exercise from Kids Help Phone

5-4-3-2-1

Name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, 1 thing you can taste

Temperatures ​​​​​​

• Drink a cold glass of water
• Splash cold water on your face
• Hold a cold can of pop
• Wet a washcloth with cold water and place it on your forehead
• Take a warm bath
• Curl up with a warm blanket or a warm water bottle

Scents

Use essential oils that feel soothing, like lavender or mint

Bake your favourite cookies

Spend time in a safe location that has a familiar and comforting scent

Tastes

Eat something sour

Eat something spicy if you like spice

Drink your favourite tea

Treat yourself to a favourite meal

Textures

Find an object with a texture that feels comforting, like a smooth stone Explore textures of the safe objects around you Mindfully feel the textures of your clothing Colours Name all of the colours that you see around you Go for a walk and look for a specific seasonal colour (e.g., look for red in the fall, green in the spring, etc.)

Safety Statements

• Remind yourself that you are safe in the present moment. This might sound like: "The date is _______, I am ______ years old and right now in this moment I am safe."
• Offer yourself a moment of kindness. You might say: "These emotions are overwhelming right now. It makes sense that this is so hard. It's okay to have difficult moments. May I be safe, may I be peaceful, may I be kind to myself in this moment."
• Practice coping statements. For example: "I've gotten through this feeling before." "I have overcome so much already, I can get through this difficult experience too." "I can allow this emotion or this thought to come and go, like clouds in the sky"

Cognitive Exercises

• Think about a person or a pet that you care about and who feels safe. Hold an image of them in your mind and spend time thinking about them.
• Visualize a place where you feel safe. It can be somewhere that you have been before or an ideal space that you imagine.
• Name all of the objects you can see around you that are a specific colour or texture.
• Count backwards from 100. If you want more of a challenge, try counting backwards from 100 by increments of three (100, 97, 94, etc.) or another interval you prefer.
• Describe the space around you in detail either by speaking or in writing.

• Create art 
• Write or journal
• Sculpt with clay 
• Bead 
• Crochet or knit 
• Colour (check out our free downloadable It Matters that You’re Here colouring book!)

• Reach out to a friend
• Spend time with family or chosen family
• Spend time with a pet
• Call a helpline 
• Get out of the house and into a public space with other people around 

• Go for a walk 
• Sit outside 
• Go to a beach 
• Go for a picnic
• Look for constellations of stars in the night sky

• Listen to music that helps you feel soothed or uplifted
• Sing
• Practice or start to learn an instrument
• Write a song that expresses how you’re feeling

• Go for a run
• Practice yoga 
• Go to the gym
• Play a sport
• Attend a fitness class

• Planting a garden or caring for houseplants
• Read a book
• Learn a new skill