Although Valentine’s Day is a great time to talk about consent, sex, and relationships, it’s important to bear in mind that the concept of consent is critical in all kinds of relationships, not just romantic ones, says Anne Rudzinski, manager of education and survivor support in the Office of Sexual Violence Prevention, Resistance, and Support.

“We can reflect on how consent shows up in our friendships,” she says. “When it's a new friendship, we might want to ask before initiating physical contact, like hugs. When we know someone really well, we might know that they're comfortable with contact, but it's always good to check in.”

Rudzinski offers the following advice:

• In romantic or sexual relationships, it's a good idea to check in regularly about boundaries and consent. Have your desires or boundaries changed over time? What about your partner?
• Being good at consent requires being good at rejection. Create space for the other person to say no, and work on accepting rejection with care.
• Sometimes certain dates hold expectations about sex, but remember, it's up to you -- and your consenting partner -- to decide what Valentine’s Day means to you. You don't have to have sex, go on dates, or do anything you don’t want to do.
• Remember that you deserve consensual, safe, and caring relationships.

Want to learn more? Check out www.uwindsor.ca/prevent-resist-support/ for resources and educational opportunities.

She points to these asynchronous resources to check out:

• Planned Parenthood FRIES (Freely given, Reversible, Informed, Enthusiastic, Specific) model of consent
• Prevent Resist Support podcast episode on bad dates and red flags with Julie Lalonde
• Prevent Resist Support podcast episode on love stories and Twilight! with Betty Barrett

If you have experienced any unwanted sexual behaviour and would like to talk to someone, you can reach out for support to the Office of Sexual Violence Prevention, Resistance, and Support at svsupport@uwindsor.ca.